What if?! vol 2 Feb #105

ImageTo many, this is just one story in a series of short stories about alternate possibilities. For others, this story started The New Testament.

While the premise of the comic was basically: ‘What if Spider-Man and Mary Jane’s baby had lived” in reality it was more like “What if 90′s Spider-Man got to be happy?” How does THAT affect the Marvel universe? The end result was amazing!

This comic spawned the 100 issue series known as Spider-Girl, which had next generational spin-offs like A-Next (The Next Avengers), J2 (Son of The Juggernaut), The Fantastic Five, and more! Than, it was rebooted with Spectacular Spider-Girl! Within the pages of Spider-Man Family, shorter back up stories were made about Peter and MJ raising their child in “Mr. and Mrs. Spider-Man.”

ALL FROM THIS ONE WHAT IF?! COMIC! To put that into comparison… sure, it’s not as important as Action Comics #1 that first featured Super Man, but it might be close to Amazing Fantasy #15. Spider-Man, unfortunately, had an already existing backdrop to explore, while May Parker, named after Peter’s Aunt, wasn’t so lucky.

Spider-Girl ended in 2010, and besides a couple of bones thrown to fans from time to time, her universe has almost completely died with her. While it’s a shame, it begs the question… What if?! What if the comic which had been canceled a few times comes back one day? What if Spider-Girl is included in another video game (Marvel Ultimate Alliance as a character skin, cameo in Spider-Man Shattered Dimensions)? Or… what if Spider-Girl being included in November’s upcoming Amazing Spider-Man #9′s 5 part mini-series leads to something larger? One can hope and dream, right?


Bob’s Burgers – Season 4 Episode 17

Image‘The Equestranauts’ was a very hard episode of Bob’s Burgers to watch, but not in that sexually-charged awkward confusing kind of way.

The episode is a parody about My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, but more importantly Bronies. Having been to Brony Fanfare, a MLP convention, this episode would make people think that pony conventions are mostly made up of old guys in fur suits, and those people are mostly in the minority. Maybe they did their research at a furry convention? Whatever. Still hilarious and embarrassing at the same time.

undercoverhorsedadThe lessen taught here is not that being a Brony is bad, but rather being a parent is horrifying. After Tina is swindled out of a rare pony toy by an Brony Equestical, it’s up to Bob to go to the convention, undercover of course, and get it back!

Cosplay, insane dealer prices, raves, bad smells, and partying! This episode of Bob’s Burgers doesn’t necessarily get everything right, but at least everything is represented, which is a difficult thing to do for a half hour show! If you hate My Little Pony, watch this episode! If you love My Little Pony, watch it twice! Once with your hands over your eyes from embarrassment, and a second time because hey… It’s Bob’s Burgers!


My Bad, bro

In my arrogance, I talked about the new Nintendo Direct’s Super Smash Bros’ Brawl video without even thinking about posting it! Here everyone goes, just in case you are late to the game… which isn’t out yet. Enjoy.


Getting Kicked Around

Samusboot1On Tuesday, a brand new Nintendo Direct was released that focused on Smash Bros. For many, the huge reveal was that Charizard was going to be it’s own character, and they were going to include Charizard’s Mega Evolution somehow… nah! J/k, It’s all about Zero Suit Samus being her own woman, and accessorizing with some dope high heels that completely change who Samus is as a character.

It was decided that characters who could transform in previous games, such as Samus, should be split up into two characters. Was this the right thing to do? Probably. Zero Suit Samus was weaker than when she was in her armor, naturally, so to give her additional strength, Nintendo gave her jet boots in the form of high heels.

Samus’ Zero suit already had a slight flat heel to them, but in Metroid: Other M, they were the stylish boots to the right. Why would a woman who is already slightly taller than 6 feet want to wear these… lifts? Pumps? My knowledge of women’s shoes are a bit limited. Regardless, Other M’s boots served the same purpose as high heels, but no one complained because the game was ‘terrible.’


Metroid: Other M

Since Super Smash Bros. Brawl came out before Other M, most people will disregard that design for the one on the left. That’s fine. Seeing as how the Boot Jets are actually in addition to her regular boots, I honestly think it’s a more sensible choice than Other M. You could argue that the way the jets come out, it prevents her feet from burning blah blah blah. Samus is an attractive character. They didn’t create the Zero Suit to be ugly, or else they wouldn’t have made it somewhat reminiscent of Auska Langley’s plugsuit from Neon Genesis Evangelion in the first place.


Super Smash Bros. Brawl

My main concern, is that Samus’ Zero suit goes on UNDER her armor. Besides the obvious fact that the heels are radically too tall to wear under her armor, adding stuff to her Zero Suit changes the entire point of it. Samus isn’t Megaman X. Or is she? Could you imagine a game where you have to play as Samus in a completely different way, picking up armor pieces for the Zero Suit even? I doubt Nintendo would ever ditch her red androgynous power suit, but an alternative bad ass outfit for games would be… well… bad ass?

ZeroSuitSamusWiiU-3DSSamus doesn’t have to be a rejection of all femininity. Some women wear high heels and don’t even think about it sending a political message. What does it say about us as people, for judging this fictional character in her choice of clothing?

And to all of the guys who are bitching about her shoes? Samus Aran is still more of a man than you will ever be, while still not as much of a woman as Final Fight’s Poison. Deal with it.


The Extraordinary League of Spider-Men, Women, and Girls


In November, Amazing Spider-Man #9 will hit shelves, and it is both starring Peter Parker (Bye Bye Sinister Spider-Man) and in the comic he teams up with every incarnation of Spider-Man that Marvel has the rights to. Sounds AMAZING! Can’t wait to see Mayday (MC2 Spider-Girl) meet The Scarlet Spider (Ben Reily)! Maybe they will fight Man-Spider?


Mermaid Discovers Football

Nice try, Doritos, but this looks too much like Blitzball to be enjoyable.


naturally Sunday

ImageFor many, Sunday is the day to play catch up. Chores, E-mail, Facebook, TV, whatever it is that you are catching up on though, you are going to need some awesome music. Might I suggest ANYTHING that has ever been on Supernatural? Or perhaps I should say EVERYTHING that has ever been on said program? This show’s music is so enjoyable and well thought out that they will even play the same song multiple times in the same season!

Maybe you don’t like hearing Kansas’ Don’t Fear The Reaper that much? If so, than I feel really sorry for you.

bumpWhat else is Sunday, the least important day of the week, good for? Wasting time. There are tons of ways to do this, one of which is building your very own custom ‘bump’ on Adult Swim’s web page. Those are the all black screens with white words on them that has music in the background that Adult Swim shows during commercials. You know what? I just realized that if I had to describe what a bump was, than you probably wouldn’t find it entertaining. At all. Huh.

Well, if those two ideas didn’t float your boat, than hey! you could always spend this time with your family. I sort of did that today by hanging out with my brother for a few minutes.

Never mind. Hanging out with family is apparently awkward. Go watch Supernatural.

Sean’s Twitter


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