Bleeding Heart$

I live in Texas, where the minimum wage is the same as the national minimum wage: $7.25. I work at a place that started out slightly above minimum wage, to later paying at least a dollar more than the minimum. The living wage for 1 adult with no children, as of 2018, $11.48. for the last couple of years, I proudly (I suppose) made just a little over that, and had been doing all right for myself, despite still living with a couple of roommates in a house.

20181013_203240In 2016, I met a wonderful girl via an online dating app, and at first we were very smitten. She was working on her Masters in Art History, and working at a museum downtown. Things seemed all right, and then Hurricane Harvey hit, and that was very rough. Shortly after that, we broke up, which was devastating… but it was in one of those wishy washy “I’m trying to focus on my studies,” spare my feelings kind of ways… that was suspicious but sort of believable. I attempted to make contact later that year in an attempt of desperation that failed.

On February 13th 2017, out of nowhere, she contacted me and we had lunch before I worked that day. Things seemed nice, and I impressed even myself when she dropped a cup and I caught it instinctively. The lunch was very nice.

I admit that after our breakup, I took things hard and ate my feelings, so I had gained some weight. Sucks. So I was self conscious about that alongside my lack of education next to her… you know… getting ready to finish her MASTERS.

Bulma Gohan KrillinShe grilled me at work via text, and I should have realized that I was under an interrogation on what I wanted to do with the rest of my life and what not, but I had no idea as I was just trying to talk to her despite the fact that I was AT WORK.

While working the Valentines Day tent at the Grocery store that I work at, she  texted me that she was going to break up with me. The worst part about doing this stuff over text is knowing that it is going to happen and is happening at like… a snails pace. Someone who I thought I once loved, and thought I could have a life with, dumped me within 24 hours because I was ‘not active’ and did not think about the future. So.. I’m fat and wasting my life… all of my largest fears realized. Awesome.

When that one huge museum over seas burned down and I wanted to stay friendly and talk to her about it, she was all ‘Get over me.’ and ouch. I try to stay friends with exes.

In August of 2019 I attempted to quit my job and they instead offered me full time. I then got a raise even that month, so now I’m making $15.25. I was already making a living wage when she dumped me, not that she knew that, and now I’m doing pretty good for myself. Not amazing, but able to really have a life, ya know?

mrskullheadI feel like she was a confused hypocritical monster. I dunno. I just… think about it from time to time, and it’s weird and funny and sucks. Maybe if she would have asked me how things were? Eh… I don’t want to keep picking at my brain with scenarios that never happened for a future that isn’t there.

Life is kind of funny.